when i grow up to really love a woman

…i will listen, and listen more, to the woman i love. i will listen to her spoken words, focusing on what she desires to communicate, rather than interpret her words into what i want to hear. i will listen to her mind, knowing that her wisdom enhances my knowledge. i will listen to her heart because the heart has its intuitive reasons beyond the rationality of the logical mind. i will listen to her non-verbal communication modes—for if i cannot hear her when she’s silent, how can i hear her when she’s talking?

…i will look into her eyes when we speak with each other. i will look with appreciation that she’s in front of me, looking into my eyes, the window of my soul. i will look into her eyes with respect, acknowledging that she has the power of discernment to tell the difference between my truth-telling and my attempts to lie. i will look into her eyes to say to her heart that she’s beautiful—an expression of admiration beyond what words can describe. i will look into her eyes to say that i love her; a love that is beyond my so-called macho capacity; a love that is tamed by a realization that i cannot produce love from my limited heart; rather, i will open my heart and mind to be a channel of true love from the heavenly source of love—such love is unselfish, unconditional, eternal.

…i will taste her breath with my gentle kiss. yes, i will taste her breath. yes, i will kiss her with a gentle kiss. when i really love a woman, i am one with her. we have one breath. we have but one life. a respectful, loving kiss is sharing of such one breath, sharing of our one life. such sharing of life is sensual—mutually satisfying our sense of taste and our sense of touch. an exploitative kiss, a mere lustful kiss, would not know the mystery, the passion, the spirituality and the ecstasy of this unselfish, giving, dignified, life-sharing, breath-giving kiss. the kiss between me and the woman i love would be the kind of sweet taste that is sacred, holy, divine. this is the kind of kiss i will kiss her with at the altar of our wedding.

…i will touch her with respect and praise. respect because she is the personified love to me. when a woman loves a man, it is not because the man deserves her. she, and her love, is an expression of divine grace. grace is something i receive though i do not deserve. i will touch the woman of my love with much praise—praise to the creator who graced me with her, and praise to the woman i love for allowing herself to be the channel of divine grace to me. i will touch her because our flesh are one. therefore, my touch will be full of grace, respect, admiration, and praise because her body is my body and my body is her body. i will not do anything to hurt my body; therefore, i will not do anything to hurt her body. i will seek to give her the soft and gentle touch that her skin and body tissues would remember as good touch. not the abusive touch. not the exploitative touch. not the oppressive touch. and when it is time for us to express the unity of our bodies, i will give her the freedom whether or not i should enter her sacred body, when to enter her sacred body, and how to enter her sacred body. and when our bodies both have experienced oneness, i will look into her eyes, taste her breath with passionate kisses, and listen to her arrival at the apex of our physical and spiritual intercourse—so that even on that mountain, we will arrive as one.

…i will smell her everyday—her body, her soul, her spirit. i will smell the fragrance of her body, because her body is my body. our bodies are the aspects of our humanity that helps us commune with each other—through touch, taste, hearing, sight, and smell. i will smell her soul, knowing that as the body grows old, the soul becomes more beautiful. a mature and loving soul is always a refreshing fragrance, extending one’s energy in the midst of the daily stresses of life. our souls are the aspect of our humanity that helps us commune with each other through our intellect, emotion, and volition. i will smell her spirit, knowing that our spirits are the aspects of our humanity that help us commune with each other and with the divine.